Due to the large number of comments we have received, there are now 8 pages here which contain your feedback. It's wonderful to hear from you - keep it coming in - and many thanks to those who have taken the time to email us.
A friend of mine mailed me your web-site address. As I write to you I have tears streaming down my face. My fiance is in prison on remand for burgalry and handling stolen goods. I don't do drugs. The lies that he has told me are unbelievable but I believed them. I had my house searched for two days for stolen goods while my young children looked on. He's a heroin addict and I didn't know. I know I can't save him and he will get sentenced for a long time. I got arrested and questioned and released. I am trying to carry on - good friends invite me out and I go some times - but then theres people who make my life hell because of what he has done. My motto is one day at a time. I have told him he is not coming back to live in my house. Fell deeply in love with him and only been with him for 6 months. Through it all I will always love him but my life goes on and I dont want to see my children suffer the way they have because their mum is "green".
Thanks for you web-site. In my depths of despair and clairity its good to know with one click of the button you are there.
Brilliant website - I'm a qualified counsellor and I've just done some printing from your site to help one of my cllients whose partner is dependent on alcohol. Hopefully this will help her and him in time!
Many thanks - keep up the excellent work.
Hi, I would like to commend you on your web site. Having suffered with an eating disorder for many years it is refreshing to read your positive and understanding advice.
I stumbled across your website for the first time yesterday. I have been with my boyfriend for the past 12 years and for the past 8 years his drinking has steadily increased. All promises to stop or cut down have been broken and he has now said he has no intention of getting help in the near future. I have now told him I am leaving and will be gone by the end of this month and I feel like such a bitch but I will not back down because I now know I have been enabling him to carry on for the past 6 months by bailing him out all of the time. I still love him and care about him but I am sick & tired of coming second to alcohol. I wish I had found this no nonsense site sooner.
Thank you so much.
After quite a few years of denying there was anything wrong with my drinking habits, I have finally admitted to myself - within the last few days - that I do have a problem. This admission has made me feel so low and so full of self-loathing. I'd been looking for something to help me get moving in the right direction instead of the direction of another bottle to make me feel "better" Your site has really helped, especially the personal touch. I'm scared of what will happen if I fail and ashamed of myself, as yet don't have the courage to admit to anyone else, though I would think there will be those about me who would already know. However your site has shown me a way forward and I can't thank you enough.
Your site has helped me understand my girlfriends eating disorder much better. I hope this will help me support her now and in the future.
Many thanks to your entire team for providing the recovery system and support that has served and continues to serve my girlfriend so well. In a funny kind of way you have brought the most beautiful young lady in the
world into my life.
God bless all of you.
Your web site is exceptionally well put together. It is very informative and easy to understand. Your no messing, telling straight like it is style is briliant, keep it up.
Hi - Today I found your website. I felt at a complete loss as to how best to help my son who has an heroin addiction, he was clean for over one year and is now back to using, reading other peoples stories has lifted my spirits and a resolve to continue offering support to him, this time he seems to be organising the help himself, he has just broken up with his girlfriend who is pregnant and may not keep the baby naturally I felt so down wondering wether he will keep on his detox or go back to using. This site has been the best I have read and the help offered is very encouraging, my heart goes out to all those loved ones who are trying hard to support their loved ones. Many thanks
I have just read your web page and I have found it most helpful and encouraging. A lot of your advice I have had to find out the hard way so I am glad to see that what I have discovered to be my last resort is actually the right thing to do. Please carry on the good work
I'd just like to say what a brilliant web site! I am recovering from drink/drug and bulemia and have read lots of information on the net but have never come across a site that presents the information so well - as regards lay out / understandibilty / amount etc. And answers the question WHY!
The list of Rights is great, I released some emotion as I read them - I happily cried.
Well done & thanks,
My father has a drug addiction and I didnít know how to react and thought I was alone but this site gave me great insight and really helped
Tonight I really really needed this help and I have been trying to figure out what to do for so long. I
just cannot do it any longer I cannot take this person in my life with all of this craziness. It is making me sick and my children are tired of it all as well.
Thank you for this information.
i was sat smoking a spliff looking on the internet and i came along ur site . i am a 21 year old male who has abused all types of drugs since i was 11 yrs old. i was not from a rich family both mum and dad in prison. my sister took care of me and she introduced me to my 1st drug - hash. so life has gone down hill since then. but then i come to ur site read what u had to say and i whould just like to say thank you very much u have given me strength . thank u
A really good website. iv managed to pinpoint my problem, i didnt know it could esculate to that level. However more people should know about this website as i only found it by chance.
I have just found your website and would like to say a huge thank you for the clarity of it, I suspect that my 19 year old son is taking drugs and you have answered a lot of the questions that are running through my mind just now and I have found the advice given extremely helpful.
I just wanted to thank you for your website. I made me cry when I realized that I am trying to control my boyfriend and that's next to, if not impossible. I've been trying for the last two years that we've been together to undo about 25 years of drug use. He has a bad temper anyway but he gets very easily irritated if he goes a day or more without drugs. He gets into his ďI hate everybodyĒ mode and starts punching the walls and furniture sometimes, swelling up his knuckles. He also tells me that Iím the cause and that everythingís my fault and gets verbally abusive. He treats me like Iím in the way and everything from our dog wagging his tail to talking to him sets him off. I try to support him emotionally but itís taking itís toll on me, if I try to sit down and talk with him, no matter how I put things, he gets mad and sometimes kicks me out, saying that Iím discouraging him and making him feel guilty.
Heís very controlling over everything I do, who I talk to, I canít talk to a guy (friend) , watch what I want on tv, eat when I want, sleep when I want, or listen to the music I want without it causing problems. He lies to me about the drugs heís doing/how much, etc. a lot too. He has put us in debt so far and he doesnít care, as long as he can put his dope on credit, it doesnít matter to him. The only thing I buy for myself is personal supplies and making sure that our dog has lots of food. We are behind on bills from years back and his attitude is ďwhat can they do to me?Ē He has gotten in trouble with drug dealers but because he has gotten out of it before, he doesnít care. His friends are always at our house smoking dope and Iíve had to tell him a couple of times to refrain from doing drugs while his very young nephew is in the house and he always promises that he will but he doesnít really care, he says itís alright as long as heís in another room. Heís stoned every day and night, he canít do anything without it and every story he tells me from his past starts with ďI was so highĒ or ďa bunch of us did so much dope that nightĒ.
When heís nice, heís very nice but I know that it wonít last but I feel so guilty, itís like I should be saving him but I canít. How am I supposed to let terrible things happen to somebody who tells me sometimes that Iím the only good thing in his and if I left, heíd never have another girlfriend again. Actually, thatís part of the problem, terrible things donít really happen to him. His parents always bail him out and give him money, knowing what itís for. They have supported him for most of his life and really are still doing it. He doesnít pay rent even though heís supposed to (itís a relativeís house) and his parents will pay most of his bills for him and buy us food. His dad sees things the way I do but I canít talk to him without making my boyfriend mad. Also, my boyfriend just blows up at him if he tries to talk to him. So, they give him money, which he spends, plus he spends our moneyÖwhich leaves me with nothing. There isnít even five dollars in the house right now and hasnít been for about a week . Half of the appliances in the house are either broken or are so old that theyíre on their last leg and he doesnít care, all he really cares about are drugs. Heís so happy when heís on them sometimes, he says that he couldnít live without them. He wonít go get help and says that he doesnít care if he has a problem or says sometimes that he can stop anytime he wants.
I can't picture having a future with him or bringing kids into this mess but sometimes he talks about marriage. His last girlfriend (quite a few years ago) had a problem with his drug use too. He says that he can't take me places or we can't go out because there's no money and it makes me mad that I'm stuck here sometimes unable to go out. If we do go out, I can't buy anything new to wear and I'm using makeup that I bought for a special occassion over two years ago. Also, he smokes and that combined with the dope can't be helping his lungs at all or his heart either for that matter. He tells me that all I care about is money and it makes me feel awful for wanting to put a bit of food in the fridge or to make repairs to the house. I care about him, about his health too but when I tell him that, he says that I don't really care and the only person that really cares about him is himself. Havn't I supported him enough? Shown him enough love? I don't know what to do, maybe I'm afraid of the answer to this problem...that if I were to leave, he wouldn't really care, he'd just go on using dope and living like he is forever. I don't know . . . but reading your website has given me a lot to think about . . . thanks.
Hi i must say that your web site is very informative and would like thank you and hope it help a lot of familys with young children to prevent there youngsters getting addicted as our son has been a heroin addicted for 12 years we have gone through all of these sinarios and still cannot see a light at end of the tunnel but we will keep trying.
Hi, I'm from Toronto, Canada and my beautiful 16 year old son died 2 months ago. It was drug related.
Your site has the best information, presented in the best format, that I have so far found on the internet. I have referred several parents to this site who have kids with drug problems.
Your site is very, very good - so please make sure that it continues.
I have just been through your site and it is helping me to get over an addiction to cannabis. i have had a very bad time at the moment. i lost my mother two years ago to cancer. i have just lost a grandmother to cancer and my daughter was raped just recently. i have been smoking the weed a lot more and had alot of paranoia and loneliness in my life. i have decided to kick the habit and hope to get my life back on track. i have printed off the 'Personal Bill of Rights' as this is what i really need right now. i will
put them on my wall and look at them everyday, as these are the questions i have been beating myself up about.
you site is so easy to navigate and i like the way you get the reader to input there name, so to make it personal. this had a very lasting effect. watch this space and see the boy grow back into a man.
I would just like to say what a brilliant website you have created.
I work for social services and care leavers in particular and they have many issues. I came across you site through a google search whilst trying to find advice on heroin overdose. Cannot express how much info I have gained from you pages - many of which I have printed off and given to my young people especially the bits about emotions and how its OK to feel lonely and scared etc.
Thankyou so much
Hi - I work in supporting families of drug and alcohol users.Sadley i got involved in this with my own son's addiction. I was searching for info for one of our families when i came across your site. Wish i had known of you years ago, so much support you offer and most of all INFORMATION very important for us it gives us power. Keep the good work up.
pretty cool website. Clear information without unnecessary rhetoric.
I have been trying for four years to access information that might aid my son (who has a dual dependency on alcohol and drugs). I was relieved to have at last read you website and its common sense approach coupled with excellent advice and links to services.
I have a bag ready for him to take his belongings in to wherever he chooses to go together with a list of agencies that he might want to connect should he ever decide he needs help.
I thought your site would have a con at the end but it didnt. i only admitted to myself 4 days ago that i'm an alcoholic. the thought just appeared fully formed in my head when i read an old diary and realised i've been doing the same things for years. it was terrifying.because i knew instantly that i couldn't moderate-abstinence is the only way for me - FOREVER! but what makes it easier is the fact that the choice has been made for me. i just know i can never drink again. your site is fantastic, truly!
Very helpful and easy to use site.
Lots of advice on what to look for (symptoms); where to find help (organizations); general help and information, for a parent who is out of her depth with a fifteen year old son who is definitely using and abusing alcohol and possible other substances.
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